December 30, 2014 at 9:27 pm (Creative Non- Fiction, Poetry, Uncategorized) (, , , )

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Life gets hard sometimes. I hope this banner puts a smile on your faces today. Life is beautiful. no matter the circumstance. i can say this with knowing my son Levi is smiling down from heaven on me and I keep moving forward everyday with joy in my heart even in the tough times. I am thankful for the love and support of my family and friends.

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Be A Tourist In Your Own Town

August 3, 2013 at 1:54 am (Uncategorized) (, , , , , , , , )

coeur-d-alene

 

 

 

Until recently I called my vacation a stay cation.

  A new ad campaign advertising activities in the area promoted be a tourist in your own town. I thought what a great idea. Many visit Idaho during the summer. I picked up a tourist brochure, and I was   pleasantly surprised at  how much there is to do in our city. We are surrounded by many beautiful lakes, hiking trails,camping,fishing the list goes on. I have been getting together with some close friends and having lunch and a nice drive catching up. I work the grave yard shift and spend most of my days sleeping. 

There are so many summer festivals to choose from. We always have a classic car show it seems. The proud owners showing off the muscle cars or seeing  the occasional Model T. There are so many plays and music concerts offered in the park this summer.North Idaho has so much to do. I am glad I don’t have the time to travel to another vacation spot because I would miss out on what we have locally. 

So get out there and be a tourist in your hometown. It may just surprise you to find out how much you are missing out on. I am almost envious of the cities having a great Art Gallery or Museum. We have smaller scale Galleries. It is nice the Galleries host a Second Friday every Month. Some Months the theme is wine and Art. The local talents showcase the art and the town stays open later. 

 We only have a few weeks to enjoy th rest of summer before school in back in. Make the most of your summer vacation and I encourage you to stay closer to home this weekend. Who knows there may be a classic car show in your area. It is raining here tonight. If it were nice, I would love to be on the water in a boat with good friends and taking in the scenery. My life has changed the last few years with the sudden deaths of both my husband and my son. Sometimes you have to force yourself to get out and enjoy the sunshine. I try once a week to go for a drive around one of the many lakes in our area. I love to put in an instrumental CD and watch for the deer to be grazing in the field. There is so much beauty where I live.I try to enjoy a little of it each day.

 Have the rest of a great summer. Grilling season is in high gear. Have the neighbors over for hot dogs tonight and watch the kids play on the lawn.I hear entertaining is a lost art these days. Let’s prove the commercial wrong and enjoy your neighbors and family.  It won’t be long before the frisbee is replaced by a football practice and homework. Life is good indeed!

 

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Living Everyday With A Thankful Heart

June 5, 2013 at 3:35 am (Uncategorized) (, , , , , , , )

Levi Degon0011

 

 

This is a picture taken of both my late husband and my son. Daddy and son were busy cleaning up the lawn for me. It looked pretty nice when they were done. I often think back on some of the best times I had as a wife and mother. Sometimes our lives take a different direction than we had planned. I thought my husband and I  would grow old together, we envisioned a life retired, proud grand parents to our son Levi’s children. I could have become bitter and angry at the loss, but anger does not solve a problem. I was given 6 years married to the love of my life; I was also given the awesome responsibility to raise my young son after my husband died from his disease. i could have said ‘life is not fair’ and this would be a true statement, but I would not be the person I am today if it were not for my hardships in my life. 

I choose instead to live everyday with a thankful heart, my strong faith has kept me moving forward in the good things God still has for me. If we look around our great nation, it is easy to see how blessed you are. We all have a bad day we slept through our alarm, kids were late for school-it was a Saturday. We can easily reflect on the bad in our lives and miss out on the good times in our lives. There are so many who have lost everything in the recent tornadoes, the big fires burning out of control, so much devastation. It is easy to forget we have so much to be thankful for. 

I was blessed by God’s protection yesterday. I did not know my thermostat housing in my car had split and all my anti freeze and water leaked out of my car all at once. I pulled into my mom’s driveway and asked the neighbor to help me. He was kind enough to replace the part for me. There are so many little things in life to be thankful for. It is heartbreaking that so many families do not gather at the table for meals anymore,The lack of respect in the teens,violence at school, road rage, the list goes on. It is not easy having a thankful heart all the time, I long for the life I shared with my family. I often ponder where we would be today if they were still alive. Take the time to hear the bids singing in the morning,enjoy your first cup of  freshly brewed coffee, hug your kids extra close today we never know what today may bring. 

I am busy planting some more flowers in my son’s memorial garden. I love to watch the butterflies flutter around , the birds playing in the bird bath, listening to the chirping of all the birds in the back yard. It does not take much to make me happy I have been told more than once. I laugh at the thought because I could have become very bitter very easily. Live is something to savor, to enjoy the beauty of each new day and the happiness it brings.  I wish you a beautiful summer filled with laughter, family,dinner parties on the lawn, football games, and lasting memories a summer can bring. Life is good indeed!

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Live Your Dreams

May 8, 2013 at 3:29 am (Uncategorized) (, , , , , )

cflowers0495


I have always dreamed about being a wife and a mother.

My friends and I used to describe what our house would look like when we married and had our zillion kids. Some of my friends dreamed of a white picket fence while another just wanted the knight in shining armor to take her away anywhere. What fun it was to dream when you are on the play ground in the third grade.

Some women never want to marry or have children. I could never imagine my life even with the heartaches I have gone through not ever being married or having my son. I dreamed of a fairy tale wedding with my dad walking me down the aisle. Jerry and I had planned a garden wedding in my parents backyard. Our plans almost were altered It was chilly September morning, and the Pastor was just about ready to head to the church to start-up the wood stove to keep my guests warm. The sun came out after all and it turned out be a beautiful sunny day. My  husband and I honeymooned in Canada. Jerry suffered a seizure while in Canada and had to go to the hospital for observation. We came home the next day. Great way to start a marriage I thought. Jerry and I celebrated many triumphs in our marriage One being the birth of our son Levi. I was living my dreams never knowing how much my life would change over night. I lost my husband 6 short years after we married due to complications from his disease. I  was left with the awesome responsibility to raise my young son alone. Levi and endured many hardships but we survived them all. I could not have imagined being a single parent, but here I was. Sometimes our fairy tale gets altered and we learn some valuable life lessons in the process. You never know what tomorrow might bring, don’t be afraid to dream and impossible dream. All things are possible with God. Jerry and I had a ten percent chance to get pregnant from Jerry’s disease. God had other plans for our lives. 

Some parents are fortunate to be grandparents. My husband and I envisioned a life as proud grandparents to our son Levi’s children. As it turns out, Levi never had children. My life had taken a different direction than I expected, but I am satisfied where my life has now taken me. I have so many memories of a husband and son to write about. I sometimes dream of Levi having a daughter with his eyes and laugh. I guess you don’t miss what you never had. 

I have met so many wonderful people since my first book healing in the storms had been published. It warms my heart to know the book has helped  other families  who are going through a difficult time.Time does heal your heartbreak, but the memories never fade. I thank God for this. I am living my dreams,but now I live the dreams God has for my life. Life is good indeed!

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Where Is Our Great Nation heading?

April 18, 2013 at 1:51 am (Uncategorized) (, , , , , , , , , , , , )

 

 

 

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I was stunned to hear the news.

Not yet another  senseless tragedy. I could not believe  what my eyes were seeing. A bomb going off at The Boston Marathon.  When will we feel a sense of security again? maybe not ever I am afraid. It is sad that a marathon in Boston was the latest tragedy. It is getting to the point where you don’t want to go to the store, send your children to school or let them play outside. When will this craziness stop? If this can happen in Boston, I cannot imagine what will happen in the next few months with city fun runs and kids sports kicking off soon. 

People used to say they would not travel to another country, there is too much violence… Well, I think pretty soon the same people will be saying they won’t travel to this city in America because there is too much violence in it. I think folks will reconsider where they travel for vacations this year. Unfortunately, I think this level of violence is only going to increase. At least authorities have a suspect , although no arrests have been made.

I am saddened for our children. There has been such a fear instilled into them. Parents are afraid to send their children to school, teachers are afraid to teach the kids for fear of a gun or knife being brought into school. What has happened  to our great country that we are dealing with this kind of  tragedies more frequently?  Summer vacation used to be something a family looked forward to, now there isn’t anywhere I care to visit as a tourist. Getting scary out there.

I don’t know about you, but I feel we as a nation-

We should have the right to feel safe in our community.

We should have the right for our children to feel safe while at school.

A teacher should have the right to feel safe while teaching your kids at school.

No child should go hungry tonight.

No parent or animal should feel hungry tonight.

We should feel safe to attend a movie with our family.

We should feel safe walking down our streets.

 

 

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I Really Needed Today…

March 27, 2013 at 9:13 pm (Uncategorized) (, , , , , , , , , , , , )

coffeshop7

I have been going through

a rough season in my life . I have been trying to keep a positive attitude in this trying circumstance and see the big picture of things.  I have been really trying to keep motivated as not to let depression come in and make itself at home in my life. We face challenges in our lives that can seem overwhelming at times, but we try to remember this is not forever and it has to get better soon.

At least spring is around the corner and we can enjoy some sunny warm days to plant and spruce up the place. After the long days of winter spent inside keeping warm, you look outside at all the projects awaiting you. My lawn guy came yesterday and fertilized the lawn so this is a start. Soon we will be busy pruning,planting mowing, watering and making our gardens beautiful unless you have a black thumb like I do, then you just hope for the best.

My best friend and I went to lunch on Monday. We both just really needed to get away for a couple of hours. We went to a local restaurant to have our usual salad and iced tea. After lunch, while I was paying the bill, my friend went into the living area to set by the fire. We met two beautiful ladies and struck up a conversation. I don’t know how we started talking about our lives, but we found out both women were sisters and had lost their husbands a year ago. I told them I had lost both my husband and my son. my friend told the ladies I had written a book about my experiences. The ladies asked me where they could buy a copy of my book, they wanted to purchase a copy after they left the restaurant. I told them and we all went on our way. My friend and I went to the book store to browse the magazines. When we were leaving, I saw the lady come into the store. She asked me where is my book? We went and found the book and as she was going to pay for her copy,she walked by an elderly lady at the end of the aisle. My new friend told the lady this is the best book ever, and this lady here is the author. After my new friend purchased the book sh asked me if I would sign her copy. ‘Of course’ I said. As I was finishing up, the other lady asked me if I would sign her copy also. I sold two books that day. All because we struck up a conversation with two ladies who had I had also much in common with.

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Remembering The Good Old days

March 19, 2013 at 6:40 pm (Uncategorized) (, , , , , , , , , )

 

 

 

 

cflowers0495

 

 

 

 

 

 

Sometimes it feels like we are

just going through the motions in life. Ever had a season where you felt like this? We get up in the morning,make our morning coffee,get the kids up and ready for school, get ourselves ready to head out the door and start a new day. Sometimes I have to stop and think is there more to my life than this routine? A rut is hard to get out of sometimes. The change from winter into spring is difficult for some because  in the winter months it gets dark so early. I know some cannot wait until spring to start digging in the dirt. Home Depot already has commercials out promoting spring.

I care for an elderly lady who lives in a quaint tree lined neighborhood. When we used to sit on the porch, we heard the birds in the neighborhood. One thing I look forward to is hearing the birds singing in the trees, and watching the cats chase the squirrels up and down the trees. Sometimes one of the cats will almost catch the squirrel,you hear it cry and get away. A few minutes later, the squirrel is back running up and down the trees again. If I could afford a house in the neighborhood I would. I like where I live and the neighbors are great, but we don’t have the peaceful, quaint neighborhood.

I remember weekend drives or visiting my grandparents in Kernville. The whole family gathered for the weekend. You would be surprised how many my grandma could put in her house and converted garage. My granddad had a Boars head in the converted garage and he was not interested in taking the hideous thing down when the grandchildren came to visit. All the kids were afraid the boar was going to come alive and get us. We used to try to con our older cousins to go in the garage with us while we played. Our parents knew we were not sneaking into the bedroom to play. Grandma always had something in the oven. All the grandkids would get to help her make desert. When she made her pies, the leftover pie crusts would go to the kids to make their own mini pies. I  was sad when my grandparents sold our weekend retreat and moved into a mobile home park. We still seen them often because our water was better than theirs, they would come once a week for dinner and drinking water. My brother and I used to help granddad fill up the five gallon jugs and put them into the car.

When I was growing up, there were no such things a call phones, ipads, or laptops. I called my friends on a pay phone. No joke. My brother’s friends brought their quarter to call home. Those were the good old days. There is so much hustle and bustle today; it is nice when you do see a family going for a walk or a bike ride. Life has changed and has become more hectic. The way teens treat their parents and talk to each other anymore is unbelievable.  If I had talked to my dad this way,  I would have been a door stop. Sometimes I long for the good old days where life was less complicated and you were spoken to in person not on your cell phone, what happened to please and thank you? What happened to respecting a curfew? Schools used to have dress codes, there was a reason for it.  Teachers used to like to teach now they are afraid of being shot. When I was in school, there were no such thing as a metal detector to enter. Kids used to go to school to get an education, now they hope no one brings a knife or a gun to school. Life has changed since I have gone to school.

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What Has Become Of This Generation?

February 25, 2013 at 4:01 am (Uncategorized) (, , , , , , , , , )

I have just read a great post.

The post talked about how rude people are getting these days. You can see people getting angry because the line is too long when the poor clerk is just trying to get you through as fast as she can. It seems like no one smiles anymore They seem like they are consumed in their obligations of the day and think only about that. I also have notice everyone seems like they are in a hurry. How many folks have you seen sail through the yellow or red light lately?  

When I see someone I haven’t talked to in a while,  I have noticed if I Talk to them, they seem antsy and want to leave the conversation as soon as they can. How sad we can’t just enjoy each others company and catch up. People are in such a hurry anymore. They are always connected to a cell phone in the ear and don’t seem like they see you anymore. You can walk down the grocery store isles and hear grumbling. They didn’t have your brand of corn flakes,or why don’t they have more variety? I hear that a lot. There are only 150 brands of cereal to choose from.

I am the most disappointed with the teens today. Their attitudes are disgraceful. I don’t think manners are taught at home anymore. More and more families are eating in front of the tube instead of at the table. I read an article in a popular magazine; the story told about how much teens wanted their parents to ask about the day and eat dinner at the table like a real family. They just wanted someone to take an interest in them and their day. And I don’t know how many young children I have seen walking at dark down the busy street alone. It is scary to see a young child riding his bike alone  past dark. I guess a curfew has gone out the window as well. It is sad to see this generation and how disrespectful it has become. The language they use could peel the paint right off the house. I don’t think a teen knows how to communicate other than a cell anymore. When I was growing up, my family would talk for hours over desert and coffee. You would visit a relative for dinner or go for a ride on sunday afternoon. People are far too busy anymore.

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Have A Great weekend Everyone.

February 15, 2013 at 6:42 pm (Uncategorized) (, , , , , , , , , , )

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Author Question “Why Did You Write Your story?”

January 31, 2013 at 10:55 pm (Uncategorized) (, , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , )

 

 

scan0007

 

 

 

 

 

 

I have been asked why did I decide

to write my first book “Healing in the storms.” Sometimes our lives are forever changed in the blink of an eye. When we marry, we envision a life growing old with our spouse, we imagine our lives retired and maybe traveling and enjoying our grandchildren. I do not live my life with what if.. or I wish.. I continue to live my life everyday looking forward to the good things God still has for my life. 

 What happens when a young woman finds herself raising her child alone after 6 short years of wedded bliss to her husband the love of her life? What happens when th son she bravely and tenderly raised is lost to a tragic car accident just 17 years later?

 

 

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