Be Real

October 14, 2017 at 8:05 pm (blogging, Creative Non- Fiction, Memoir, Middle age, positive thinking) (, , )

 

I was reading an article in a popular magazine a few years ago, the story has stayed with me.  TV commercials depicts a family run by the kids. Most children if you ask them, do not really have a concept of how much lunch costs. If the child is raised with respect, they will eat what is being served. I do understand a parent would not make a dish that the child clearly will not eat.

When I was growing up, the family all ate together. Period. We did not grow up with all the electronic devices kids today have as their source of communication.  It saddens me to see a commercial on TV where the mother texts the kids at the dinning room table to tell them time to do the dishes. My brother either washed or dried the dishes every night.  Our parents worked hard everyday to provide for the family, and the kids had chores to help out. Boundaries and hard work around the ranch helped make me the person I am today.

I also see on the news a child took a gun to school and shot a classmate who was harassing them. After dinner,if the family sees each other for a family meal,kids go to their rooms and play X Box, mom and dad are in living room on the phone,easy for junior to go grab a gun or other weapon to conceal in his backpack. Parents are over committed to work, after school games, Church functions and the kids know it. I believe it makes it harder for a child to tell mom or dad they are being bullies. The kids hear parents talking about the rough day they had. If you let a teacher or the principal  know what’s going on, more bullying. This is going to continue to be a growing problem. With budget cuts, the good after school programs are being eliminated. Kids have no where to go.

My brother and I were raised around guns; We knew we did not get into the gun case unless an adult was there the gun was properly checked. We were not given the combination to the gun safe, we did not try to get into the gun case when our parents were not at home and a friend came over. My brother and I respected the privacy of our parents personal space. We did not go snooping around to see what was in the bedroom closet. No, we were not perfect kids,we still managed to get into harmless trouble, like the snake that got into one of the rabbit pens. Dad told my brother and I to take the snake far out into the nearby field and release it. Jeff and I took the snake to the edge of the property and let it go. next day,snake had baby rabbits for lunch. Jeff and I disappeared in the orchard on our horses for the afternoon.

I am glad I do not have grandchildren who has to attend school. The online public school is rapidly growing. Parents want the kids to get a good education without all the drama of Kindergarten.i have seen and heard some boys and girls that need more than re-direction. It does not help that adult sit on both sides of the fence with discipline. When my son was three,my husband told him to stop his screaming, a lady told my husband she was calling the cops because he was being mean to the boy. Jerry told the lady”go ahead, my son is not going to scream in a public place.” Who is right and who is wrong anymore?

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The Joys of Fall Decorating.

October 6, 2017 at 7:24 pm (Creative Non- Fiction, Memoir, Middle age, positive thinking, Uncategorized) (, , , )

 

 

You know you are getting older,maybe a bit unorganized when you are putting on finishing touches for fall. Have you ever had the “I know I put it here last season”,or “think about where is the last time you have seen this item?” It ends up in the last place you thought you would find it, after almost giving up entirely and going and buying something else.

They say the Golden Years ain’t for wimps and they are right. you find your reading glasses on top of your head, go into the bedroom only to try and remember what you needed.  How many times (be honest) have you put your car in the garage only to grab your keys not 20 minutes later to put her away? I am not alone.I am thankful my car keys has a place- really. in the front pocket of my purse. Let’s say while putting your groceries in the car, you run into an old friend and begin chatting. Innocent enough. Now after you have said goodbye, and you are continuing to put away your groceries, you put away the shopping cart thinking about how nice it was to see an old friend. You realize after your get home, you have no purse. But,you were smart enough to put your keys in your pocket. When you get back to the store you are one, grateful you were not pulled over because you know you are going a little fast than required by law, and two you are thankful someone turned in your purse untouched. ( not necessarily a true story on my end).

I love the fall season. I am blessed that a couple years ago, a good friend turned my basic closet into our version of a California Closet. I added an extra rod for seasonal clothes, and shelves for purses and shoes. I have a dresser for my uniforms for work, and night time attire. I can remember several years ago watching an afternoon Home Improvement Show. Christopher Lowell transformed a closet into  something beautiful. Some use the top shelf for storing sweaters, he used the top shelf for beautiful hat boxes, flowers, candles. I used some of his ideas to create a beautiful organized closet. I started to pants together, blouses together, skirts and Capri pants together. I had a small closet rod installed for my dresses. It really made a difference, I have so much more room now. I am finding the older I get, the wiser I get also. I realized, I do not nearly as many clothes as I once thought. When you buy a tunic for example, it can go with two pair of pants. Put a jacket on,change the whole look of the outfit.

I still need to hire my next door neighbor to come help me with my fall cleaning. I have curtains to hang, weeds to pull(she is going to love me), a few items to donate, then, we will go over to my moms house and tackle her garage. It is not that bad, but much needed. I am thankful I have a neighbor that can lend a hand and she can pay a couple bills also. I cannot tell you what it means to live in a nice,quiet neighborhood. Everyone is respectful of each other, not loud parties, no one is hostile toward anyone. It is peace of mind to know your home is being watched over by cameras and we are our Block Watch Program.

 

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Another Perspective

October 2, 2017 at 9:38 pm (blogging, Creative Non- Fiction, Memoir, Middle age, positive thinking, Twins, Uncategorized) (, , , )

 

 

My twin brother and I celebrated our birthday last week. We are now living in our golden years. I have grown not only a year older, but also wiser especially this last week.

Sometimes when I have a conflict in my life, I try to figure out a quick solution; this doesn’t always work out the way you thought it would. I realized that life is full of heartbreak, poor decisions, and not giving up. I always figured if I gave up, how could I know how God worked in my behalf. I struggled with the sudden loss of my husband and my son. I put my life back together piece by piece with the love and support of family and friends. I had to realize the their deaths did not mean the death of me as well. I keep moving forward each day with expectancy.

Conflict is like laundry day. it would be just as easy to shut the washer lid, but you did not work through the problem. I come to realize problems do not have a thirty minute solution like on the Brady Bunch. I finally found a solution that I can have peace with. You job, home life, caring for your aging parents have good aspects and challenging ones. I had a funny thought that helped me you are standing in a big hole filling up with water. Scary thought huh. I imagined my best friend standing in the hole with me encouraging me not to give up-and to climb out of the big watering hole as well. But I can choose not to stay in misery.

I think I get a little melancholy sometimes because my two best friends are busy with their jobs. We used to have the same days off , so we would go for a fall drive and get a coffee from a java hut on the way. I had more fun with my one friend whose husband is a paint contractor. She spent one day doing returns and asked me along to keep her company.  We always had fun(she didn’t know why I could have fun tagging along with her). I was able to get out of the house for the afternoon and spend the day with someone I treasure. My other good friend  and I loved taking out fall drives around our small town. I looked forward to our salad bar lunches and coffee to go. Sometimes I ride with her to see new properties she will be managing in the future. Some nice neighborhoods out there.

 

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An Unexpected Surprise

September 25, 2017 at 8:36 pm (blogging, Creative Non- Fiction, Memoir, Middle age, positive thinking, Uncategorized) (, , )

 

While driving home from work last week, I felt a chill in the air. The temperature felt nice compared to last week with over 90 degrees heat and no rain for 80 days; either my grass gave up trying to grow and stay green or I just gave up spending a small fortune on my water bill trying to keep it green and somewhat healthy.

My friends call me the black thumb gardener because of the state my grass is in by the end of every summer. But I do notice many households share the same fate as I. If you drive around the neighborhood,not all the lawns are plush green like a golf course. Most are a sickly looking green with a tinge of white. So I began to feel a little better about my front and backyard. I hired a lawn care service to spray my grass for weeds and to help keep it healthy. Well, not even the fertilizer helped. I had six-inch grass that was green, but I did not dare cut it or it would turn very brown instantly. My next door neighbor teases me because I water more than he does and his lawn in a nice shade of money.

With the smoke and hot days behind us now, I was looking over my new hydrangea plants I had planted in June. I had torn out my overgrown shrubs and rose bushes in my front planting beds. Last winter was cold, and snowy; For feet of the white stuff came down on top of my shrubs and roses and cracked them in half. I have a positive outlook on such matters and decided I needed a change. Besides I just had my house freshly pained, a new metal roof, why not update the beds as well.  My lawn care expert told me how to care for them plus I hear they like full sun I deep watered the new plants when the scorching heat came. My new flowers look so pretty in deep pink now that the season has changed. (maybe I may have to give up my long standing title now who knows).  It is hard to try and compete with your best friend who has a yard to belong to the garden tour. I have learned that my home is in a nice location just down from the lake, plenty of hiking trails, deer,birds merrily singing, and ducks quaking in the river. I live in a great neighborhood with friends you can count on.

I was getting ready for the chilly mornings, less watering, less plant and lawn care, and I can enjoy my special coffee creamers in my coffee every morning. Time once again to dig out my sweaters, leggings, boots, scarves, and heavier jackets. Time for a couple more neighborhood BBQ’s, and once again have the gang over for the famous chili cook-offs and your favorite football team. The leaves are starting to change color,chilly mornings and pumpkin spice everything right now. Life is good indeed!

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A Personal Perspective

September 20, 2017 at 9:29 pm (Creative Non- Fiction, Memoir, Middle age, positive thinking, Uncategorized) (, , , )

I was reading through my Face Book news feed the other day and ran across this quote. I do not necessarily agree with what is says. In today’s world, life is fast paced, road rage, people are impatient, rude, do you really want to know what someone is having for dinner?

I am thinking your boss appreciates the employee who is on time everyday, meets deadlines, has a positive attitude. After a long hard day at the office, I think a wife appreciates her husband coming home instead of stopping elsewhere first, starting the grill and  having a nice outside dinner. Afterwards maybe swimming in the pool or taking he family dog on a walk around your neighborhood.

Feeling appreciated is a personal matter. Few bosses will give you verbal encouragement. Some Companies give a gift card, movie tickets for appreciation. Sometimes when a boss asks more of you, maybe they have confidence in knowing you were the best person for this task; When you have a good working relationship with your manager, vacation, sick time, personal time are put into more consideration. Let’s face it, a good employee is hard to come by.  My Company has new hires not even showing up for the first day. ( I have always found this interesting the new hire sees what is expected of him/her, then they are a no-show).

I am happy with my life, I have a good secure job,get along the people I work with, have a nice home one block from the river, have the love and support of family and friends. I have a blog that people read and leave positive comments, and help care for my aging mom. I have survived a few personal tragedies,by I am stronger for it, and I can encourage and empower others to keep moving forward toward happiness.

 

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Forever Changed Lives

September 6, 2017 at 7:30 pm (blogging, Creative Non- Fiction, Memoir, Middle age, positive thinking, Survivor) (, , , )

 

 

Lives have been turned upside down, side ways, tumbled, and families are waiting for relief.  From the storms that rage on from Irma and now Jose,the fires raging in the Northwest,to continuing hot,dry conditions.  My home is surrounded by the heavy, nasty smoke in the northwest. I gave up watering my yard,but decided to have mercy on my Hydrangea and cut them back.  We have not had any measurable rainfall since June.

The fires raging out of control in Oregon was deliberately set. I still cannot believe someone can set a fire in a beautiful forest enjoyed by so many FOR FUN. I heard on the news campers are still not following the no camp fire bans and some have resorted to setting around a propane camp fire. Campers are brave souls because when animals get scared, they are more dangerous. I don’t know about you,but  hearing a moose cry outside my camper would be an eerie sound, a bear trying to come inside where it is maybe safer,( he expects a hearty breakfast in the morning). Next Month is the start of hunting season, the game may figure it better to migrate this year to a safer location. (Forget the natural GPS,) It has been a crazy whether this summer soon becoming Fall.

Maybe this is the reason so many homeowners are deciding to stay home and turn the home into a family resort. Backyard grilling station, a nice pool, fire pit, covered patio. I think it a wonderful idea you don’t have to fight the kids to pack, no packing the car, if you forget something, just head back inside-you can now afford the better cuts of meat for your camp out. Oh, burgers and dogs are fine,but sometimes you want to resort live. My favorite summertime commercial showed a mom and daughter in their swim suits, getting ready to sit by backyard pool; later, dad grill dinner, after kids have gone to bed, parents enjoying a glass of wine by the outside fireplace. Anyone can add a vacation feel to your home. After roasting hot dogs over the BBQ, pitch the kids tent in the backyard, (let them listen to the cricket’s chirp over the freeway noise) In the morning,make a pancake station and let everyone add the toppings. Sure to be a big hit.

Families will soon get back to the new normal. Many live in areas that flood every year, tornadoes are common, fires rage on, and choose to rebuild. Many have said they can’t imagine living anywhere else. I pray for hope, peace, getting the fires under control, and Irma and her devastating aftermath. Sometimes you wonder how you can go through so much and keep going strong. Some have lost everything…again…. there is a spirit in these individuals that keep going and fighting. As a Great Nation we still are, e come together, letting go of the fighting, riots, and hate instead showing what we are really made of. We are a melting pot of many ethnic backgrounds,  family values,  traditions, started families, live in small communities, provide for their families,looking forward to the next generation. We live in very uncertain times,we do not know what is around the next corner. Hug your kids extra tight tonight,tell them how much you love them,how proud you are of them and you are glad they are in your live. Nobody is promised tomorrow, make the most out of today.

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A Shared Room

June 13, 2017 at 8:45 pm (Creative Non- Fiction, Memoir, Middle age, positive thinking) (, , , )

 

Growing up, my family lived on the outskirts of town on a ranch. My twin brother and I were in 4-H. We raised sheep, ducks,horses,rabbits and were visited often by the snakes who loved to snack on baby rabbits. I look back on my youth with a new appreciation. I used to dream of switching homes for the weekend with one of my friends. I laughed to myself every time I heard how lucky I am to get to ride my horse anytime I wanted. You also paid for the hay to feed your horse, cleaned the big smelly coral, had to brush the horse everyday. , You get up at six every morning to feed and water the sheep and the rabbits. Then rush to get dressed and eat breakfast before heading the mile walk to the bus stop. I lived a mile away from the nearest housing tract. ( some friends were still jealous). 

 I sometimes envied my friends because they had a few more girls to go into town with and play with. I only had my brother and the animals to talk to. Having a twin brother was fine until one of you wore out his or her welcome and then you fought. Life is always greener on the other side of the AstroTurf. I can really say I had to realize not everyone was lucky enough to have a horse at eight years old with a huge orchard behind my house yo ride. My parent kept a couple of horses for family because we had such a big coral. On weekends we usually had a crowd for dinner and then horse back riding. My dad was the proud owner of a 1946 Willies Jeep,so we had fun driving around the many trails and mountains behind our house. 

I didn’t realize how lucky I was to have only my twin brother until I started to sleep over at a friend’s house. My brother and I had always had our own bedroom. We both shared a bathroom,but we had our own space. I used to watch a few sitcoms in the 1970’s and wondered how  sisters and brothers could  share the same room and bathroom without taking a number. I did not realize closet space was at a premium, shared dressers,you had to all agree on a room color and pictures, no privacy, wanting to borrow your older sisters clothes. Some of my friends had two sisters and a brother.

When my brother and I were teens, we decorated our rooms in our taste. When we moved into the house,my dad painted the room the color of our choice,as we got older, we put up posters.  I had a crush on Randolph Mantooth,you could not see an inch of my walls through the posters of Johnny and Roy. I grew out of the phase and decided I wanted to skip over my teenage years and just have a young adult bedroom instead. I opted for roses everywhere. We are so funny in out teens aren’t we? i cherish the many wonderful memories of teaching a friend how to ride my horse and trying to talk her into getting back on my horse after he bucked her off. She wouldn’t budge and my horse just stood there waiting for her to get back on. I had to do the noble deed. You could almost see my horse snickering at her. I realize I had a good childhood living  life on the ranch not sharing my bedroom with anyone except my occasional guest. 

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Enjoy The Simple Pleasures In Life

April 22, 2015 at 6:01 pm (Creative Non- Fiction, Middle age, Poetry, Single Parent) (, , , , )

images (20)

Enjoy the beauty in each new day.

Letting go of what is not important.

A cup of coffee with a good friend.

A game of football with the kids.

Simplifying our lives.

Forgive often,healing the soul.

Hugging your kids extra tight today.

Let your children know how valued they are.

Plan a family reunion.

Cookouts in the park with a game of volleyball.

Taking the dog for a scenic walk.

Planting flowers with your grandchildren.

Roasting hot dogs over a campfire.

A family day of fishing.

Your young son picking you flowers from your garden-priceless.

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